The Diary of Dain
by Backroads
Summary: You probably think Dain is just a horrible backstabbing monster.  Don't you know he has feelings, too?
1. Chapter 1

Dear Diary,

It's so nice to meet you! My name is Ol Number 4791. Today I was created by an evil process combining unethical science with dark magic, like so many of my brothers before me. I'm so delighted in my purpose of serving my Dark Master in his evil schemes of total domination. I hope I can serve him in my own humble way.

Oh, having dreams and goals! Just thinking about them makes me feel all warm and gooey inside. I just want to give my Dark Master a big hug, but Ol Number 4784 tried that today and was promptly annihilated. Our Dark Master is very big on his personal space. So I'm going to try my darndest to respect that!

My Dark Master has amazing goals. He's extremely goal oriented. In fact, at orientation today he showed us a great chart of how he has broken his main goal into more manageable smaller goals, completely with plans on achieving them. By next week, he wants us to think of a goal in our personal lives to present to the group.

I'm not sure what my goal is to be. Of course, I just want to help him conquer Deltora, but he wants us to really think about what we want out of life.

I'm not sure I like my home. I live in the Shadowlands, which are all blighted and icky and ugly. It's not a happy place. We live in a giant fortress. It's surrounded by a wall of spikes with heads stuck onto them. It's not very welcoming. I thought about saying something, but I don't want to be the one to critique my Dark Master's taste in home décor.

But I do like Ol classes. Even though it's my first day of existence, I still had to take them. But they're important. Not only do we get to learn evil sayings and wicked laughter, we are practicing on how to shapeshift. I shapeshifted in a baby chick. Everyone thought it was really cute.

It turns out that I'm a special breed of Ol. The other ones are quite weak and can't hold shapes very long. Also, I'm going to be trained on how to be smart so I can ignore the buddy system. See, the buddy system requires that Ols travel in pairs so if that one is violently destroyed by a servant of goodness the other one can get away. At least that is what they tell us. Personally, I think it's because the Grades 1 and 2 Ols are morons. None of them can turn into baby chicks yet!

I think I really like baby chicks. They're sweet.

Well, it's time to go to sleep so I can be all ready in the morning to do evil. Maybe I'll dream about my personal goal.

Good night, Diary.


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Diary,

It has been over a week since we last chatted, I hope you weren't offended. It's just that learning to be a proper Grade 3 Ol is so difficult and time-consuming! But you musn't think it was frustrating! No, not at all. Though I end the day in exhaustion, it is a satisfying exhaustion, the kind that comes from good old fashioned hard work and evil doings.

Speaking of being evil, I love it so! Our Dark Master has taught us so many things! Why, just today we learned how to laugh evilly and take candy from small children.

So I have come up with my personal goal, my dream. Someday, I want and wish to be the greatest veterinarian's assistant in all of Deltora. When I told everyone how I wanted to help vets to save itty bitty little sick animals, they all went "awww". Even our Dark Master seemed to be touched by the idea.

Someday, after our Dark Master has taken over the world and implemented his evil purposes, I'm going to go to veterinary assistant college, preferably at a local trade school specializing in such a degree.

I'm making lots of new friends as I'm training to be an Ol. So many that it's really kind of hard to keep track of their specific numbers and categories. I suppose that's all right; we all exist to see forth the purposes of our Dark Master, is that not right? Anyway, my strategy as of late is simply be super friendly to all the other Ols and hope they like me. So far I seem to be pretty popular. Probably because I'm such a special Ol.

I wonder how much I could demand of all of them….

I wonder if I threw a party, how many of them would come because I'm so popular and so powerful of an Ol…

What kind of party should I throw?

Well, I shall return with that answer.

Goodnight.


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Diary,

Today was the Best. Day. Ever! I threw my Ol Party and everyone came including my Dark Master the Shadow Lord. We all laughed and talked and stayed up late to play games.

I knew my Twilight-themed party would be a hit. I considered inviting Stephanie Myers herself but I didn't know her address. Everything was black and white and red and we had an awesome Twilight cake.

My favorite Twilight character is Alice and I'm on Team Edward. My Dark Master is Team Jacob, so we had a friendly little debate about that. He tolerates my opinion better than other's. In fact, he tortured then killed eight different Team Jacob Ols.

Anyway, I looked awesome. I wore black pants and my I Heart Vampires t-shirt and I shapeshifted in a black baby chick which was still cute while fitting in with the party's theme.

I really like the Twilight books. And baby chicks.

I'm getting better and better at shapeshifting! It's so cool being a servant of evil and darkness and mayhem with all my cool perks of the job.

Soon we are going to be released into Deltora to assist with my Dark Master's evil plans of total domination. It sounds like so much fun and I can't wait for it.


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Diary,

Best. Day. Ever!

I am finally being allowed to travel outside the Shadowlands in order to serve my master with his dark and evil and sinister plans of world domination. It brings tears of joy to my eyes just to think of it. To think that I could one day be allowed to help destroy all the citizens of Deltora!

I have a new name! I get to be Dain now. It doesn't have a generic and impressive number attached to it like 4791, but I'm still pretty psyched. Dain. Apparently its an anagram of the Adin who was this horrible fellow from years ago who decided to be an upstart and unite Deltora against the Shadow Lord's power.

It's like everyone in Deltora is against him. Can no one appreciate him for what he does?

Anywho, I am going to be named and I am going to turn myself into a handsome human pansy boy where I will put on an act of emotional bravery and subtle pain. My job is to lure people into thinking that I am the heir to the throne of Deltora.

It's like a fairy tale! Of course I'll just be helping my dark master take over, but it is kind of fun to pretend to be a prince.

Good night!


End file.
